I Am Who I Am

I was prompted today to write a poetry or prose piece and the theme was: I am who I am... Issues with my birthmother have been front and center lately... I think since my visit to San Francisco. I am working on a follow up to our visit but thought I'd share this piece instead. I hope to hit the mic with it some day. Without crying.

I am who I am

And it’s because of you

A one night stand

Is a part of my truth

Matters not that you loved him

But what happened after

In a house of shame

Far from derision

and laughter

you got acceptance

with your food and your bed

while I swam for my life

nourished by what you fed

a meal missing love

it’s no wonder I’m tired

while you watched Butch Cassidy

my womb-lease expired

discharged in a river

of blood, sweat and pain

you pushed me out

then gave me a name

Gloria. Marie.

Was tossed out into space

Then lost in the shuffle

Of papers, red tape

Before I could exist

or my race would start

I fought for my life and

a place in your heart

But I didn’t win

And neither did you

There’s no draw in battles

Where both parties lose

Still I persevered

In an attempt to be better

My womb, the answer

To your… Dear-John letter

See- I’ve loved my own

And those not mine too

Those cast aside

the neglected, abused

Trying to add color

For those feeling blue

I don’t love ‘cause I must

But because I choose

I give what I missed

So they don’t miss too

I am who I am

And it’s because of you.